We don’t get out much “like just us two (2)” on dates and things like that … but My Hubby surprised me with an early anniversary date night the other night.
July 4th is actually our Wedding Anniversary, so Happy Anniversary to us! 🎆
but, for our date night, he took us to this super fabulous restaurant. It was a roof top restaurant with yummo delish food and we watched the sunset too. 🌅
It was a beautiful night indeed. We dressed up. I put some make-up on, I did my hair, and it was nice for both of us to just “be” for a few hours.
We smiled and we laughed, we held hands, we talked about our girls 💗💗💗 (of course.) We also discussed that we both know we need to do this more. We truly have to find the time to pencil in date nights more … (maybe every couple of months.) 😉
My besties have been telling me this for years and most recently one of them had a discussion with me on, “You need to fill your cup, he needs to too, you both need to fill your cup!!!” 😉🥰
I mean, since having babies we still can count on one hand how many times we have been on a “date night!” Don’t get me wrong we have been to weddings and in quite a few too, in the last eleven (11) years. Yes, our oldest little love 💗 is ELEVEN (11) years old, WOW – man time flies when you’re having fun!!!
Again though, what a fun night …
So, possible goals – plan on “dating” more again soon, maybe? 😉 …
I am a girl, who’s mind is always going. This year like I have said, has been NONSTOP!!! Actually, we picked up even more so, on our “busyness” during Covid. Crazy right?
It’s true though, my husband got promoted during Covid. Our girls were in school remote and took on Soccer ⚽️ in a whole new fashion because it was their only outside outlet. I was insanely busy with Scentsy and so forth …
It’s crazy looking back. Things began to open up, the schools opened up fully too. My husband was now “in person” at work due to him being an essential employee and we were trying to go back to some sort of normalcy.
So now, it is SUMMER ☀️🍉⛱ time, so we are home 💗💗💗 and all the pile up to-do’s that have been piling up, and piling up all school year long. Well, it’s time to tackle them! I am going to pause as I write this and say, “Give yourself a little grace because there is a lot to do, so take your time and don’t rush it!”
That ⬆️ is not easy for this Mama, but here goes … one thing at a time!
First up, craft/school room and check ☑️ at least it’s now cleaned out, organized and much was donated!
and the pantry ☑️
one of the closets ☑️
(there’s two (2) sides to these closets ⬇️, but we want to change out the doors and add some lights! 💗 So closet change-up to follow 😉)
Okay, taking a break today … It is Friday and our little loves 💗💗💗 want a pool day and a day to just relax. So, penciling this in, along with some haircuts too.
I am making progress though and you get the idea of what my goal is … 😉
So, let me discuss a little about mom life, or let me say, “parent life!” We try, and we try daily … No wait, actually it’s more like hourly.
Our girls 💗💗💗 they are indeed sweet girls, but they are still girls (which means emotional, for us) and they are also good kids, but again they are also still kids.
We raise them to have manners, be respectful, and we are currently teaching them to have confidence, be the bigger person when dealing with “the turkeys” in this life.
Yes, “turkeys” a co-worker told me this once, when I was dealing with quite a few turkeys myself while in the working world before babies. She explained how we deal with turkeys in life and then said, “don’t let the turkeys get you down!” 🤣😉
Well, currently, we are dealing with “turkeys” from every angle.
As are our little loves. 💗💗💗
Now, at the end of the day each situation is “small!” However, when dealing with “it” from this angle, and then this angle, and then this angle, and then this angle, etc. You get the picture!!! Currently, we are 🤯🤯🤯
I woke up early today (like before 5AM) because my husband is off to work super early. (There’s an event today,) but all was on my mind. I must have been dreaming about it?
It’s weird too, because I can tell certain people are backing away from us because they know something is up, but don’t know much because (we are private people.)
Which to be honest, is smart. Sometimes, you just need a breather to collect all of your thoughts …
I mean, we are calming down compared to a few weeks/months ago. We are starting to be able to process all, stay away from certain individuals, watch all a little clearer, understand a little more, but again although much is “small” … from all angles combined, “it feels big!” 🤔
I can honestly say that I have dealt with “turkeys” all of my life. So, I see it so clearly when our girls are telling me things. I get it too, it’s part of life, but it’s hard as a parent to teach your child, that this is how life is … they’re like, “but I am doing the right thing.” They’re playing their cards right, they’re being the bigger person, so they ask, “Why does this person get this or get that, when they’re not doing the right thing!” 🤷🏻♀️
It’s sad, and I think that’s where I am at … it is just SAD!!!
I get it, we all want our kids to shine, but they shouldn’t shine when they are being a turkey in this life and to be honest, we all know, that they sometimes still do!
What we tell our girls … “It doesn’t matter, it won’t work in the end, because God 🙏🏼 is always watching, so always remember that!”
I often will watch/listen to how people will write the word or even say, “Mama” …
I watch and I listen … many when talking about this role often say, “mom” of course. They will say, “mommy”, but I smile when I see others say or even write momma and truly what gives me more of an aweee 💗 is when I see it written out as “mama.”
Mama is near and dear to my heart. This was my title for awhile in this house. Our first little love called me mama when she was first learning how to talk, and then one day switched it to mommy. I remember crying when she said mommy too, (listen it’s a mommy thing for this mama, okay! 🤣)
However, out of no where she said mommy one day and she was confused as to why I was now sad … She actually went in our bathroom and grabbed me a tissue and brought it over to me, looking at me confused! 💗
Yes, my sweet little almost two (2) year old, knew to bring me a tissue whenever I was sad!!! Cute, right? 🥰
So, here’s the thing … she actually always thought she was saying “Mommy,” but since talking was all new to her, it was coming out as “Mama!” 💗 I truly loved that she called me Mama. Don’t get me wrong, I loved that she was now calling me Mommy too! 🥰 but Mama … is just, 💗 tear!!! 🥺
Oh those Mommy stories, so I will often write “Mama” and whenever I see someone else write out “Mama” I just smile, because it’s just near and dear to my heart! 💗
Okay, I am trying, I am … I am trying to drink more water. Hydration is key and “OH!” to the times of me being dehydrated! I was on average drinking maybe 8-20 ounces of water, a day. Now, my goal is to drink 50-60 ounces daily.
I am on week two (2) or maybe three (3) 🤔, I believe. I can do this and stick with this too! 😉 To be honest, I start this up and I do good for about a week, but then I usually stop. So, trying to stick with it this time …
I was told by many that you are to drink half of your body weight in ounces.
That to me, I was like, there is NO WAY I can drink that much WATER daily! Where my husband drinks like a gallon of water daily. Drinking a good amount of water, just isn’t as easy as one would think? 🤔 Especially, if you are not use to it (like me.)
Here was my normal daily routine of drinking beverages. I would wake-up and drink my morning coffee, and then I may sip on water here and there. Then I would have a cup of hot tea in the afternoon, then I finally would drink water with dinner and before bed. So, I was drinking fluids, but WATER, not so much. So, I am consciously trying to drink 30 ounces of water before 12:00 noon and then the next 30 ounces before sleepy time.
I keep reminding myself (so I stay motivated), that you are flushing out toxins!!! Try it, it helps … 🤷🏻♀️😉
You see, in the last ten (10) years I have learned much about my body, more in regards to my health and how my body responds to certain things, like food. I mean, once our first little love was six (6) months old … (on Christmas Eve to be exact.) We were leaving a family party and my mouth was suddenly in pain. I initially thought, I must have burned my mouth on something. As the days, weeks, months progressed, the pain intensified!
My tongue was sooo sore and my mouth would always have canker sores and this was only one (1) of my new found issues/symptoms. However, it was one of the WORST too. I also had joint pain, fibromyalgia pain, GI issues, weird anxiety, a rash on my upper arms, etc. I thought for awhile, (and certain Doctors confirmed) it was hormonal , postpartum … after all I just had a baby. 🤷🏻♀️
Today, I am gluten free and labeled “Undiagnosed Celiac.” Mainly because I just get too sick from gluten, and I can’t eat it long enough to be tested. (To be honest, I no longer need to be told I have Celiac Disease.) I tried a few years back to go through testing, (per my Doctor.) First step, was to go on a gluten challenge. I made it to only, day three (3), goal was to eat gluten for twenty-one (21) days. 😬 After dealing with pain, (fetal position pain) off and on for over 24 hours and ongoing GI issues, my Doctor said to stop eating gluten. When I went into the Doctor’s office, he said, “Clearly gluten is no good for you, so DO NOT eat it! Listen to your body, and if you need a diagnosis … I am diagnosing you with Undiagnosed Celiac!”
I also have a family history of Celiac Disease, Crohn’s Disease, Diverticulitis, Thyroid Disease, etc. (which many or maybe all 🤷🏻♀️ are autoimmune) So, it was inevitable that I would end up with something at some point. I mean, I have been told that I have had many things, since I was a kid. I was diagnosed and placed into categories like IBS, Lactose Intolerant, Interstitial Cystitis, Keratosis Pilaris, etc. All come to find out, are are linked to Celiac Disease and can mimic or even cause these symptoms, and when I gave birth to our first little love, WOW to the symptoms!!! Hence the beginning of me, going gluten free. (When she was around eight (8) months old to be exact.) Then, I ended up pregnant again with our 2nd little love, when she was just ten (10) months old, so I stopped my gluten free diet per my OBGYN’s request. At the time I was deficient in certain vitamins too, so she put me on a prescription prenatal vitamin. She explained to me that eating gluten while pregnant, may be more beneficial to the baby and it may not bother you while pregnant too. She explained that staying gluten free while baby is in utero, could actually bring forth an allergy to baby earlier, if not exposed to gluten. So, I ate gluten (and it was delicious) and I was not bothered by it either. 🙏🏼 However, after our 2nd little love was born, WOW again to the symptoms. So, I officially went gluten free when she was just a few months old and I have been gluten free ever since.
I tried to eat gluten again while pregnant with our 3rd little love, but at this point I no longer could, because it made me sick. More so with fibromyalgia pain, joint pains, tongue pain, canker sores, etc. and here’s the crazy thing too, our littlest love came out with Eczema and still has episodes of Eczema. So, could it be because she wasn’t exposed to gluten while in utero like my one OBGYN explained. 🤷🏻♀️🤔
I have been doing research too on different foods, plant based foods, avocados, red meat, protein, etc. Trying to figure all out. As I have been researching and looking into nutrition, as a whole. Foods are actually medicines for our body, so like “eating” is hugely important. Helps with so much from our sleep, anxiety, to hormonal health, etc.
I never looked at food this way, I looked at it as, “I am hungry, is it dinner time, okay eat!” or “I am NOT eating that!”
So, like I said, looking into nutrition more so now. As well as HYDRATION. Also, fitness, and getting back into it because I just feel better over all when I am working out. Trying to run more, walk the miles too, just basically loving cardio, but as we all know …adult life, parent life = busy life!
I started up Wellness Wednesdays, a few weeks ago. I wanted to try to take fifteen (15) minutes to an hour or more to do something for “myself”, like wash my hair, maybe a mani/pedi at home, facial, take a bubble bath, etc.
Just a moment to pause …
So, I had a “day of rest” yesterday for Wellness Wednesday. After a Doctor’s Appointment that went well on Tuesday, praise God. 🙏🏼 I said to myself, “Just relax today, take a bath, blog again and just be, and don’t feel guilty. You owe this to yourself!” 🙏🏼
You see … Mommy life, and life in general. I just often do not schedule in those little things that I once did for myself, before having babies. Life is just busy differently now, so things like hair and nails aren’t a constant anymore.
So, for example, I normally get my hair done maybe twice a year. (So here was the deal, I haven’t had a hair cut, gosh in like 6-9 months, maybe longer. I mean, I did get to the salon in October, to get a quick gloss because my hair was lighter over the Summer … Yes, I actually for the first time EVER was at the hair salon three (3) times over the Summer going lighter.) So, anyways, my roots were now like 2 inches long, so I decided to go back to brunette (and now, not sure if I’ll go blonder again this Summer. 🤷🏻♀️)
Now back to being busy, so I often will schedule a hair appointment and then cancel, schedule, then cancel. No worries though, I finally made an appointment and actually went too. Just wanted to get my hair cut and I ended up taking a good 4 inches off, maybe more 😉 so back to self care, I was actually getting my nails done for a few months in the fall, because I told myself, “You can do something little like this for yourself” … but now I am over that (not a surprise) so stopped with that all together because my nails just got too weak.
Wanted to explain something, I have never been “that” kind of girl. Who’s always at a salon. I just cannot sit at salons for hours 🤷🏻♀️ I think I am just too type A. 🤷🏻♀️ I mean I try, I do, I try, but then I am like okay, no! I don’t feel like sitting in here for an hour or more.
However, I do want to have moments (from time to time) of feeling pampered, so I love to get a pedi, and maybe I will start scheduling facials? I am trying to learn to go to the salons more … especially now that Covid is lifting. 🙏🏼 (we are praying that is … )
So maybe, I’ll schedule them in from time to time now, on Wellness Wednesdays. 😉
Okay, here goes, Happy Monday … as you have seen, I am starting an actual blog. A blog where I will actually try to “more so” take moments throughout the week to spend an hour or so writing, posting, researching, sharing.
So, again I say, “here goes!”
Just paid for a domain too (eee 😉) Well, we have the money now, so saying bye bye to all of the free sites that I have used since becoming a Mommy.
Pause – still have no real clue how to do this, “this” meaning – starting an actual blog? It’s okay though, I got this … There’s Youtube, Pinterest, Google (although I question google because seriously what is going on there … anyone else realize that you cannot google the way you once did?) Now, finding time to research all it entails to become a blogger, that’s another story? 🤷🏻♀️
So, blogging, writing … I mean, it’s an actual “thing” … seriously … If you follow influencers, you tubers, etc. Many do have blogs. So adding “my new blog” to my to-do list. 🤷🏻♀️
You see a few years back, my bestie once told me, during one of our morning conversations, “You hold yourself back.” My husband then confirmed this when I asked, “Do you think I hold myself back?” … They both ended up saying the same thing, “You aren’t a risk taker, some take risks and aren’t afraid of failure!” Well, this got me thinking … 🤔
Coming from them … it just made me think. 🤔 You see, they both are indeed successful and they both will take risks. They aren’t afraid to take a risk (or to make a decision, is a better word) in their professional worlds. I guess they’ve learned that you will never know, unless you try or say yes or no. They often say, “If it doesn’t work … then okay, let’s try something else.”
To be honest, maybe this is why he is an Excutive Director at an Ivy League University and she owns her own business in the field of plasma/science.
Throughout the years, I have enjoyed meeting so many in my circle … but these two, just so very blessed by them. One, to be married to my love and my best friend, and two, to have a gal by my side since HS. I just think and talk very highly of these two, not just because they are my husband and my best friend. I am just so proud of them both, setting goals, sticking with their goals, and their work ethic, their achievements, and their success.
So, I am going to stick with blogging, or at least try to stick with it …
See I am a gal who’s always setting goals. I achieve some and let others go because that’s just “me.” 🤷🏻♀️
My first priority though, is always my family. We decided, while expecting our first little love that I would be a SAHM, so I gave up the career world. It’s crazy looking back because it had it’s challenges for sure, especially in the beginning, but I definitely do not regret it, not even for a second.
Throughout the years, I have taken on other roles while being a stay-at-home mommy. In volunteering at our church, our girls’ school, and their activities. I was a Cheer Coach, an Etsy Shop Owner, now an Etsy Shop Manager, a Coaches Wife, now a Scentsy Consultant, etc. Here’s my website for Scentsy ➡️ http://jenniferbendas.scentsy.us
So haven’t exactly been bored by any stretch of the means, but now an actual blogger with an actual domain 💗…
Do you want your own blog? Do you even want to be a blogger? What even is a blogger and why do “they” bother sharing a little of this or a little of that? 🤔
My husband actually just said to me (this morning actually.) Why babe? What is the point? Just continue in your success with mommying, helping others, volunteering, Scentsy, and all the things. You do not need anything extra. We do not need anything extra. 🤷🏻♀️
As you are reading you may be agreeing with my husband, but you may also be saying let the gal do her thing. My response was, “Babe, I don’t know? It’s not about money. I want my “own thing” too, in between mommying, being a coaches wife, my husband’s wife, Scentsy, volunteering, etc. and I like to write and have done so, off and on since becoming a Mommy.”
I mean secretly … (or maybe now that I am blogging today it’s “outwardly!”)
I would love to have this little blog take off in some sort of fashion. I would love for Cozy Styling to turn into my own personal business (along with Scentsy) for not only myself, but for my family too.
Me & my little family 💗
I mean let’s be honest, how in the world do bloggers actually make money? I mean, I am pretty curious on how this actually could turn into another job? I find myself looking into it and then a text or call comes in, mommy gets called, I get distracted, etc. So, I get NO WHERE!!!
I have mentioned somewhere along the way though, that for whatever reason a “blog” seems to always come back to my mind and stay on my heart. I often will forget about it (because in the world of mommying, parenting and adult life), life is busy. Then something will remind me to blog again and stick/stay with it.
I don’t publish my blog posts regularly either 😬 so I have like 17 or so in my drafts. (Actually they are now saved as photos in my phone (haha) because I now have started my very first ACTUAL BLOG with its own domain … which is the reason to why you are reading this first blog post, so yayyy cozystyling.com)
So, for now, I am going to just enjoy this little hobby of mine (and I just read not to call it a hobby too 😬 … oh boy so much to learn), but like I have mentioned, I enjoy writing.
I look back and during college, a few professors actually tried to encourage me to minor in English/Writing. 📝 They loved my Writings/Essays and would tell me that I had a natural talent. Which, was such a sweet compliment … but a career in “Writing” Really? What would I even do with that? Become an Author?
I mean, a runner, yoga & pilates ☑️ … but an Author 🤷🏻♀️
It’s crazy really because we all have goals and even dreams in life and it’s not always easy to focus on/stay focused on these goals.
The fact is … life is busy, like when I began writing this blog post, I was running all day, Both figuratively and literally and I was in our just turned 6 year old’s room, waiting for her to go to sleepies. She wanted mommy, wanted me to put her to bed. (My husband and I take turns. We come in, tuck her in, give her kisses, pray with her, and then we sit and wait. Eventually, we know she will not care if we are in here, but for now she cares and wants us to stay, so we stay.) Sometimes while I am in with her, I will read, or I will research, I will pray and sometimes I will blog.
So, back to starting a blog. Where do I even begin with blogging? I guess, “just write!” One thing I read was, “find your niche”, well my niche is simple, “just stay true to me and blog about whatever “cozy” (or idea) that is on my mind.
Which brings me to the name, “Cozy Styling.” Cozy Styling is meant for me and for others to share their cozy in life. Maybe your cozy is a cup of tea, coffee or matcha or even a nice run? Maybe it’s going to church, reading the bible? Maybe it is your latest fitness find, diet fad or gluten free recipe? Maybe your cozy is date night with your hunnie? Maybe it’s heading to the beach or to the boardwalk on a Summer Day/Night or a night out with friends? Your cozy may be just staying in with your family and playing games?
Cozy Styling is meant to help you find that cozy in life on the daily. (It is meant to help “me” find that cozy in life on the daily.)
I look at life and like I said, life is just so darn busy and man does it fly right on by … in my 20’s I had a mommy blog and didn’t really understand blogging or know what to do with it? However, at the time I had so many things going on. Being a new mom, giving up goals and aspirations on being a career woman, being broke, letting go of the old me, embracing the blessing of being the new me, etc. On top of mommying babies, nursing them, health things, etc. So, writing was my pause in life.
I’d blog while I was nursing or rocking my sweet babies. 💗💗💗
… but to be honest, I still don’t know much about blogging or becoming a blogger. Except writing, so for now, I will just write! Maybe it will turn into something? Maybe it won’t? However, my first step, just write!
So adding continued blogger to my list (with an actual domain now – ahhh how cool is this) I mean stepping out of my comfort zone with this domain.
I work part-time from home with Scentsy and Etsy – Cozy Styling (changing Etsy name soon.) However in 2022, my goal is to blog more and find a routine in all of this.
Cozy Styling 